MY new doctor is quite a bubble mouth politically once he gets talking. He is like Commandant Fidel Castro delivering a statement of the Non-Aligned Movement (NAM) at a UN Summit. He never stops talking and the journalist in me now believes that I am a keen conversationalist too in the absence of a Windhoek Lager.
So I engage in discussion to gauge if any idea comes my way that I can build from.
As if God-sent, two weeks ago I went to see my Black Economic Previously Advantage Currently Empowered General Physician (I opted for a black doctor from Katurura, after my white former from Stellenbosch advised me to quit kapana and Windhoek Lager) for that we ended our professional relationship amicably. So he asks me John are you in the minority?
“Nope, I am full Wambo with Mbwitish backgrounds, my blood lines contain the blue, green and red of the party, for soccer I loathed and love equally at the same time Blue Waters and have a penchant for Afrikaans songs by Laurika Jauch, Carike Keuzenkamp on Radio Kosmos and watch Lierike- raai with Solly Philander.”
Exactly my point, stressed the doctor, you are in the minority. So are your needs taken care of politically, think about it?’ he asks.
So think about starting a party since everyone is in the habit of starting their own party.
So I did as he advised me and that if the needs of my fellow mbwitis are not taken into consideration, I will register my own party, just get authentic and genuine 700 Ombwitis.
For long I had harboured the ambition of being a president you know, I have the quality. Especially since my first attempt at leadership was back at high school when I campaigned for SRC president. The teachers robbed me, only five years later did one teacher confirm that they rigged the result because I was oratory and very popular, so they wanted no problems.
So, I register all Mbwitis for the new party, our recruitment drive will be based in all towns with no regional ethnic orientation, such as Tsumeb, Walvis Bay, Luderitz, Grootfontein and some yet to be identified towns.
I have already devised a name, the “Political Association of the Ombwitiis (PAO)”. We will be a party with no political enemy, but with very small personal economic ambitions.
For patrons and influential people we are considering DJ Mo for his exceptional business acumen to canvas funds for us. Jossy Kauandenge alongside Phura for the cultural and entertainment arena and Toby Aupindi responsible for the design of a forward base turnaround strategy for Namibian politics.
For manifesto, we will have different manifestos each coming from our support base, in Gobabis we will have the Vootrekker Manifesto Beraad, in Walvis Bay it will be known as “the Chester Maarsbanker Manifesto Plan” in Luderitz we will call it “Die Boegter Afrikaans Manifesto vir n Effektiewe Namibia” and in Oshakati it is to early at this stage to campaign there, but we are on our toes with a name.
I will endorse myself, for presidency of the party. Me and my executive committee will have no ambition to become state president or the ruling party, as long as we are in parliament, which is fine by me. Instead of hoping for parliamentary seats I will instruct my executives do scrounge for directorship in parastatals, banks, diamond entities and fishing companies.
Our estimate does indicate that we can become opposition number three, you know, but we believe in the policy of assimilation first thing we get Monitor Aksie Group and join alliances, for whatever reason we don’t know, but it is a political move. We will arrange to settle CoD debts and then we propose a takeover in the business sense, this is purely a business strategic move; on one condition they resolve their differences.
With the other parties like NUDO we will pledge solidarity for the Chief as he fights to get the Bundestag Genocide reparations, after that we will approach NUDO for a donation. The DTA and UDF we will work a sharing strategy for representation in parliament, Monday we are all PAO, Tuesday we become UDF and Wednesday we become DTA, Friday and Thursday everybody on his own. As for the RDP we are monitoring the situation closely…
If by miracle we win elections, then we will propose a sale by decree to the highest bidder (or political party with intentions of running the country) for a substantial takeover fee of course. Before we get to that we will decommission the ACC and appoint Sackey Namugongo and Theofelus Eiseb to become our focal points in the takeover government.
After all this who said politic was that complicated, it is very simple.