Neville Basson We are moving slowly towards pay-day so just hang in there okay …. things will clear up very soon! No more not answering your cell phone for no identity numbers. No wonder people who are getting paid today are refusing my bloody phone calls! On behalf of all citizens in Katutura I would like to extend happy, happy birthday wishes to Comrade President Pohamba! May God bless you and keep you for many many, many, many, many, many more years to come! I never realized how blessed we are having such a wonderful President as yourself your Excellency! I would not have had this voice today in an independent Namibia if it were not for your steadfastness, resilience …. unwavering commitment towards the struggle to liberate this country 16 years ago. Hope you have enjoyed your special day thus far. During Aboetie Hage’s thesis you urged everyone that night to have babies in August because Leo’s are people of strong and humble character , you are right …. but I think you might have been wrong when it comes to Lazarus Jacobs! I think you share a birthday with him. People keep on thinking Comrade President that I am the arrogant one in our relationship but soon you will realize he is actually the arrogant one! Ha!ha!ha! I just thought that this is the first time really that we have the opportunity to share in your birthday as President so we would like to urge people out there to send out some gifts to you which I think you would really appreciate . Here are a few gifts that I think would make you very happy! Holiday for two to Khorixas: I really think Mr President that you would enjoy this destination as a birthday present! If you pop in at some of the top spots in Khorixas you would see for yourself that the people down there can prepare a good donkey steak for you ! I mean ….Tate Kulu said mos some years ago that all donkeys must be transported to Khorixas, they will be better utilized there. Go for it, I tasted it myself …. really good! Makarov pistol from Fidel Castro: You see, El Capitano helped us a lot to liberate this country, I could organize with him that you get his pistol in case he retires. During farm negotiations (willing buyer , willing seller) we can get you to join us to speak to these Boers who are not too willing to sell ” their farms” to government . I am not so sure if Fidel would want to give you his holster too , but we can negotiate! Bottle Mellow Wood: Don’t drink it please! Keep it at state house just to remind you every time what happened to PW Botha when he lost a battle against Swapo fighters during the struggle! You and Tate Kulu can have a good laugh every time you look at the bottle! As much as Tate Kulu asks for the souvenir , please don’t give it to him ….we’ll think of another present for him on the 12th May next year! Shoprite gift voucher : Since you are constantly complaining about not being able to shop anymore we felt that this is the best thing we could do for you now. I advise you Mr President not to go to Shoprite next week Friday because you might have to get in a 40m line to the till point with guys from the ” groot winkels” in Katutura asking you for a lift home or something. I suggest you take additional pocket change with you cos these guys might just forget you are the president! It’s not much Comrade President but you can work with this okay? Once again, happy birthday and Kalunga’s biggest blessings on you! Mbye mbye!
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