Atatata…and I thought our own Tura is like no other place on earth. Askies, if you don’t like the Big Brother Africa show, but during these dark times in our country where all types of violent crimes are blooming like flowers in Namaqualand, where people are being robbed left and right and where women are being killed like flies, there is not much to laugh about.

That is why I decided to take refuge to Biggie’s House where I was hoping to borrow some interesting material from our Lady of the Fifth Month, Roki the Weirdo from Zim and that newcomer promoted to Upville, Keita who left the xamadulas in Downville without his not-so attractive Brazilian hair-hungry girlfriend. After all, it’s my duty to make you smile and send you away for the weekend in good spirits.

But lo and behold, when I switched on the show, I could hardly believe my eyes when I saw a true reincarnation of our own Ou Doring from Nama lokasie with the fists of steel. DKB, a.k.a. Scarface from Ghana did the unthinkable for all of Africa to gasp for air when he gave baldhead Zainab a stywe, taai klap.

Vakuetu, where did Ghana get this guy? From a pondok in the backstreets of Accra where he was sipping on some Tombo or smoking dagga? The BBA team must have been scratching their heads when they went to the Land of Dr Kwame Nkrumah to do interviews for the show, only to find that everyone was too cultured and conservative. I suspect that this is when they came against this skelm (thug) fresh out of jail who had no manners.

And as for that straatmeid from Sierra Leone, Zainab, titse, I have now developed a certain anxiety for girls from that country. I mean, we cherries are normally brave, loud-mouthed and can send a guy to hell with our poisonous tongues, but eish standing up to a dude that size and challenging him with words like “Slubb (slap) me b*tch!”, LOL (laughing out loud).

But on a serious note, I did not like the Scarface’s violent reaction and was jubilant when Biggie sent him home. I don’t understand why he also had to send Zainab home though. Is it because she peeped into the bathroom while DKB was naked, poo? I have seen girls verbally fight like chickens in the BBA house but they were never disqualified before for vloeking (cursing) at each other.  
Og, I can imagine how Zainab must feel for going home with a bald head, a taai klap and without the moola.

The next time BBA calls for entries for the show, they must be very clear what they are looking for. We have plenty of Zainabs and DKB’s in our lokasies here in Nam, but we have disqualified them because we are afraid they might smokkel (smuggle) in okapi knives. We thought Biggie was looking for sophisticated contestants, but this year’s show is crazy.
 Sorry Ngo!